You don’t want your daughters running around at the beach looking like a couple of whores, do you? Of course not. Thank god for WholesomeWear – a website that sells stupid-looking waterproof dresses. Citing a “need for modesty in swimwear,” WholesomeWear bathing suits “highlight the face rather than the body.” What are these people gonna do at the beach anyway? The kind of person who buys their daughter WholesomeWear probably won’t let them have any fun there anyway. They can’t build sandcastles cuz shovels are forbidden, and they can’t play volleyball cuz nets are for devils. Look at that chick on the right in the picture – the lake water is burning her skin. Get off my beach, you weirdos!