Filed under: photoshop fun
I have a new article up on Cracked.com today. Go read it.
New article up on Cracked today. That’s all.
It’s ironic that Africa is kind of shaped like a giant t-bone steak.
As you may have heard, the Hard Rock restaurant, hotel, and casino chain has been acquired by the Seminole Tribe for $965 million. As such, the company’s operations stand to change dramatically over the next few months. Here’s a small sampling of what’s to come, according to a trusted and reliable Seminole insider. Seriously.
– Employees will now be paid in blankets and liquor.
– Full-time employees will have the opportunity to trade all of their earned blankets and liquor within any two-week pay period for ownership of Manhattan Island, which can then be sold back to Hard Rock management for $24.
– Chief Planted Bush want raise.
FASHION DO: Tight pants, sleeveless shirts. “Rock n’ roll” attitude.
FASHION DON’T: Headdresses, hides. Anything “Indianish.”
FASHION DO: Korn t-shirt.
FASHION DON’T: “You Slaughtered My People And Robbed Us Of Our Land” t-shirt.
FASHION DO: Tattoos of skulls, roses.
FASHION DO: Mohawk.
FASHION DON’T: Mohawk.
New food items to be served at all Hard Rock Cafe locations include the following:
– Holy Moley Seminoley Guacamole
– Tomahawk Taco Tots
– Antiquated Way Of Life Jalapeño Poppers
– Peace Piperific Pizza Tubes
– Trail Of Tears Spicy Buffalo Wings
New customer service standards will be implemented beginning January 1, 2007. We like to call them the “CARE” Plan – just follow four simple rules:
C – CREATE a pleasant atmosphere for the customer!
A – AVOID bringing up the fact that the colonization of North America completely decimated an entire race of people!
R – REMEMBER to refill those drinks!
E – EMPHASIZE the gift shop!
I found this jpg on a backup CD I was digging through. And just think: It could have been lost forever! Thank God I backed it up!