I Give Up.
Thursday July 13th 2006, 9:49 am
Filed under: internet crap,press releases,videos

This post was supposed to be called “Less Effective Hats.” It was going to have a bunch of pictures of famous hat-wearing historical figures photoshopped to be wearing, um, different hats. Hilarious, right? Well Napoleon didn’t look quite right with the trucker hat and I couldn’t quite match the greys between Abraham Lincoln and his new viking horns and you know what? I give up. There was one that I thought was kind of funny, though, which I will now post for your viewing pleasure.

What unexpected juxtaposition! Delightful! You want more? Fine. Here’s a bonus prize: a video of a narcoleptic daschund.

[gv data=”http://www.youtube.com/v/CY5PMT-_rLg”][/gv]

PR Roundup.
Tuesday May 02nd 2006, 11:16 am
Filed under: advertising,media,press releases

On May 6, Perry, Georgia will host the 12th annual Georgia Lineman’s Rodeo. Events include the “Hurt Man’s Rescue,” “Transformer Change,” and the always-popular “Conductor Tie-In & Arrester Installation.” A 23 month-old baby released his first CD, “Go Baby!” Ralphe Armstrong, who played bass on the CD, described the baby as the “reincarnation of drummers like Buddy Rich or Tony Williams… It frightens me he is so good.” The fastest man in the world drinks Nutrilite, and the American College of Radiology announced that Tom Cruise is in no way qualified to perform an ultrasound. Old Navy has announced a nationwide search for a new “spokesdog,” and Cocktails By Jenn, maker of ready-to-drink flavored vodka martini mixes, has announced that “girls’ night is alive and kicking.”

Because knowledge is a weapon, folks. Use it wisely.

(previous PR Roundup here)

PR Roundup!
Monday April 17th 2006, 11:16 am
Filed under: press releases

Researchers at the Pacific Institute for Research & Evaluation announced today that fans of hip hop and rap music are more likely to have problems with drugs, alcohol, and violence than fans of other kinds of music. The Weinstein Company announced that “Scary Movie 4” grossed over $41 million this past weekend, making it the highest grossing Easter weekend opening of all time. Leonardo DiCaprio will be dedicating a grove of trees to honor his mother and grandmother this Mother’s Day. You can too for the low price of $100 through TreePeople’s Gift Of Life Tree Dedication Program. Taco Bell has discovered a fourth meal between dinner and breakfast. A leading provider of free premium online content has announced a partnership with Wrecked Exotics, a website that hosts “the internet’s largest collection of exotic car crash photos.” Johnnie Walker has announced that they will donate $100 to Recording Artists, Actors, and Athletes Against Drunk Driving (RADD) every time the Yankees draw a walk at Yankee Stadium throughout the 2006 season.  Through a study conducted by International Communications Research, Slim-Fast has announced that 56% of all Americans would like to lose weight to look better this summer. The survey’s findings were released at the same time as the announcement of Silm-fast’s “Time 4 The Beach” getaway sweepstakes. “The wordplay on the number “4” in the name comes from the newly reformulated Slim-Fast shake, designed to control hunger for up to four hours,” the release says.  And the frontmen of two midget KISS cover bands, MiniKISS and Tiny KISS, are battling for the rights to the act.  “Little” Tim Loomis of Tiny KISS says his band is totally different than Joey Fatale’s MiniKISS.  “It’s not even the same… mine is three little people and one fat chick, and he’s just four little people,” he said.

Happy Passover: Have A Black Jesus.
Thursday April 13th 2006, 9:29 am
Filed under: movies,press releases

immana holla atcha.The long wait is over, people.

Warning/Nu-Lite Entertainment has announced the release of their new film, Color Of The Cross. The film will depict the final 48 hours of the life of Jesus Christ.

Oh – and Jesus is black.

Now I know what you’re thinking. You’re worried about all the controversy this is going to cause, right? Maybe a bit concerned about race relations? Don’t worry, little buddy – the film’s director and star, Jean Claude Lamarre, knows exactly what he’s doing.

“To watch a black man on screen, being referred to as rabbi, or to see him partaking in a Seder meal and observing Passover really blurs the lines that divide blacks and Jews in this country. We are part of the same history,” he said in a press release issued today.

Check out the trailer here.